I saw a picture the other day that called my attention. It was a woman in her late 50s in a swimsuit with all the vulnerabilities that are natural at a woman’s body, specially at that age, who said; I have a perfect body! It is perfect because it’s healthy and strong and take me everywhere I want. I found that strikingly beautiful and impactful. If you follow me for some time, you know that I struggled myself with my body when I was younger and worked in fashion. I was not considered suitable for the industry and that caused me to leave the industry that I so loved then. Now in hindsight, I know it was the for the best cause I got to work with real women which is my true passion. We are all born with confidence, but we start to loose it due to society's pressure for us to be a certain way. The question is; until when are we going to pursuit something that is not realistic on a personal level in order to feel better about ourselves instead of accepting ourselves as we are? There's nothing wrong with willing to improve, but normally people feel bad and weak to do something about it. I know it is intrinsic from the human being to have a sense of belonging and conforming, we want to be like everybody else and we want to have just the opposite of what we have, i.e. if we have curly hair we want to straighten it, if we have straight hair we want to curl it, if we have large hips we want to have flat hips, etc..
As a personal stylist, I'm getting more and more the sense, mostly from my clients, that we are not good enough. I see how they feel confronted with their image and bad about it, they get defeated to say the least. It's a big pressure to feel the need we have to be a certain way. For me, the only way is to focus on ourselves, what we really value and our strengths and assets, since we cannot make people or situation change. In my work, I help my clients bring the attention inwards, to find their inner strength, they unique qualities. Everybody has their own light that shines and once uncovered, brings tremendous satisfaction. When we like what we see in the mirror from an outfit perspective, it becomes easier to make the internal changes. It motivates us to do what we need to do and it's faster. That's how magic clothes can be, it can instantly change our self-perception.
After I quit fashion, I focused on my health and my overall wellbeing more than ever, I have always had a healthy life, but I started to take care of my mental health as well, I started meditating and doing yoga. Now I exercise regularly and eat as healthily as possible. Nothing without balance, I do have pleasures too, it is important. It is a commitment to our wellbeing and it is not impossible. We don't need to have time to start eating better, right? And you don't need to meditate or go on a strict diet either. Spending some time in nature and 30 minute power walk 4 times per week is an excellent start and as per diet, cut back sugars and carbohydrates. You can replace them for the brown versions.
As a mother of a girl, I want the world to be better for her, I want her to pursuit any career that she chooses and not worry about how the looks.
It's my wish for all women who feel less than confident with themselves to look in the mirror and really see the beauty inside and not look for an 'ideal beauty' out there, the one that is ephemeral and created by an industry today and that will change tomorrow, just like that. I do encourage a change in lifestyle, tho. If you feel you need to loose or gain weight, I think it is important to implement simple changes in order to improve your overall wellbeing. Life is way too short for us to postpone being healthier. In the meantime, learn what styles work for your particular body type so you feel better and more confident until you get the desired result.
I love fashion. I've said many times that fashion is art for me, what I don't appreciate is the pressure it causes on people, specially women. I am a big advocate on us maintaining our integrity, our uniqueness, as opposed to trying to be a copy. That's true beauty, for me. xx