May 14, 2019 5:32 AM
How we filter our image through our experiencesStyle
As a society, we are very judgmental, we have strict ways of how things should work and how we should behave, look etc., and as a result, we are equally judged! For me in particular, being judged on how I looked was very unrealistic when I worked in the fashion industry as I was judged by the industry patterns, which are quite strict. I was perceived as overweight when I was perfectly normal. That experience filtered my image in the mirror for a long time. I saw myself with large hips when I was normal compared to other women in other industries. Although deep inside I knew there was nothing wrong with my body, I started to hide by wearing baggy clothes, which made the problem worse. I thought everyone was looking at me and felt very conscious. it's not a nice feeling. Eventually I learnt all the tools to disguise my 'problem' area and got on with it.
But then I started to release, thankfully, what all of that was doing to me, that's when I left the industry. Not with sadness, as fashion was my passion, or so I thought it was. Now I know my true passion is to help women feel good just as they are and not based on a unrealistic standards.
We all want to feel good and walk tall and be at peace with the mirror but how many of us really feel that way all the time? Most of us have gone through some sort of anxiety regarding our less than perfect body parts. But as we grow older and with maturity hopefully some of us start to understand that we all have flaws and assets and that learning how to enhance our assets and camouflage our little flaws is the way forward as opposed to hide them like I did. Working with real women of all sizes It fascinates me what clothes can do. You name it, elongate legs, slim down, make taller, shorter, larger, draw the attention to or away from a particular area... Even if you say you don't care about how you present yourself, you are still being judged. Why not be judged on your own terms? How would that feel if you left the house feeling confident on yourself? Wouldn't you feel like interacting more with people? Learning to accept that although we may love certain types of clothes they are simply not for us is a great start. Learning what compliments our body and makes us feel and look pretty, only happens when you make peace with the mirror without any distortions and keep track of how you look. When we lose track, we might end up realising that there's too much to catch up with, nothing wrong, but it's more work at the end. WE all have some kind of tinted image of ourselves, some more than others but it's up to us to break through that and start looking at ourselves with compassion and acceptance for the beautiful women we are. We may still have our goals to improve but during the process, just embrace your complete self by making the most of what we have or as I said earlier, enhancing our assets and camouflaging our flaws. But let's be clear disguise is not the same as hide! One is make it less evident or deviating the attention from, the other is trying to make it go away. There's a big emotional difference here.
My own body hasn't changed much since I was in my twenties but now I am much more at peace with my less than perfect parts. I still don't wear certain styles, such as pencil skirts or skinny jeans, because they simply don't flatter me. Style wise, I am extremely eclectic and go with the flow of the day. Some days I feel like being more sexy and showing a bit of skin in the right places, others I feel like being more adventurous and take risks, I just want to have fun with it.
I love having a voice and being able to share some experience with you all. Hope I have inspired you to be yourself and not take other's opinions too seriously xx
I am wearing Tibi dress | Brian Atwood heels | Proenza Schouler crossbody bag | Celine sunglasses